Never Sad, A Little Sad. Okay, Sometimes, Periodically Sad for My Thing

...my Thing 1 craves a daddy; a basketball partner; a penis colleague; a man-in-arms.

I'm not sure I ever would have fulfilled that for my beautiful, masculine Thing 1. The guys I'm attracted to are brainiacs... not exactly jocks or chain saw operators. But, strangely, La Gringa is.

La Gringa and I feel bad for you, son, tonight. I know you want a man, honey. We'll do our best to fill you up with plenty of the Y chromosome. Until then, I can dribble with the best of them, La Gringa's got a crazy shop to power tool-til-the-cows-come home and we both understand a boy's gotta do what a boy's gotta do.

I still wish you didn't cry tonight when Thing 2's friend's daddy didn't play basketball with you. It made me cry.

And the Cupboard Was Bare

As you know by now, BFF's son was just diagnosed with Asperger's, a disability that is a sucky, but a manageable form of Autism. We're three months into the diagnosis. We've drunk bottles of wine, cried, laughed, been pissed, had uncontrollable sobs (myself included).

But this kiddo is starting to thrive. A gluten-free diet, caesin-free diet, low sugar diet and tons of behavior shifts have made massive changes to his and their life. BFF is finally getting out and about again and family dinners are back in full-swing.

Last night we had BFF family to dinner and it took La Gringa and I a few hours to figure out what the kiddo could eat and still feel like he'd had yummy food at his Aunty's house.

I took two photos of my cupboards -- shocked -- I found that there was almost nothing I could make with what I had stocked.

Pasta? Nope. Mac N'Chees. Nope. Bread. No Fucking Way. Grilled Cheese, Quesadillas, Flour, Sugar, Bisquick, Cake Mix, Butter, Cheese, even some forms of Soy are all no-gos. No pancakes, syrup or bagels, no cereal, no burgers (at least not with a bun), no Dunkin Heinz or YumYum Donuts. Ever. There goes my whole dang cupboard.



Here's our menu for last night that worked out okay:

Corn Chips with Salsa and Guacamole.
Corn on the Cob
Tri-tip
Salad with vinaigrette (no cream dressings, no croûtons)
Fruit kebabs
365 Soy, dairy free, lactose free, gluten free vanilla ice cream
365 box mix gluten free Chocolate Chip cookies (substitute apple sauce for butter).


Here's what I'm going to stock always for when my kiddo visits:

Corn Chips
Soy cheese (double check, no caesin)
Corn tortillas
Sandwich meat
Soy milk (no sugar)
Rice crackers (he likes spicy ones)

Life with a dedication to your kid's health is all consuming for each of the mommies I know. But we've got nothing on BFF. She's a fucking rock star.

My Wheels are Too Small...

I can't help but feeling that no matter how hard I spin, how fast I spin or how much spin I put on something, that my wheels are smaller than my world needs to spin.

I'm not cool enough to understand Twitter, not 2.0 enough to know the insiders, not a hands-on enough Mommy to be in the In-Mommy-Crowd, Not funny enough to be considered funny but way too funny to be considered normal. I'm not understanding enough of the social networking space to fully be able to guide people about what to do with it for their own businesses. I can sell it, I just can't believe in it, which makes me, by definition, a bad salesperson.

Frankly, I really don't give a shit about Facebook (although I udpate mine at least once a week). I Twitter, but no one gives a shit about what I write, especially me. I am infinitely interested in what other people are Twittering, but reminded constantly that I'm not cool enough to be popping-off Inside Jokes with other Twitterers. I don't care much about cool websites, but pissed when it's they are not done right. I don't give a shit about business models and spread sheets and MBA crap -- except it's my job to totally get that crap. I get it, that's not the problem, it's that I don't care about it.

I wonder how many people don't know or give a flying iPhone about the Web 2.0 conference last week, the launch of the SDKs, the cost of Facebook apps or what blogs are on my Reader. I literally cannot read enough to keep on top of all the shit I have to read. And even when I do, somehow my colleages always know it just slightly faster.

I feel like I'm cheating on the Internet with my real life. I was away from my computer for 12 hours today. Bad girl.